No meaningful football this weekend. A preview of what the next couple of months is going to be like until baseball season finally starts. The NBA sucks until the playoffs, where they will let James Harden get hacked. College basketball is stupid until March. Sorry I don’t get excited for 1 of the 2 times Duke will play North Carolina BEFORE they probably play again in the conference tournament! So for those of you who don’t want to watch the Clippers get shit on by the Warriors, or the Cavs somehow lose to OKC, and Lebron leave his teammates out to dry to the media….. I got you covered fam.
Senior Bowl Saturday 1:30 eastern. NFL Network.
Get your football in while you can people. Last college football action for a long time. No Deshaun Watson means you’ll get heavy Josh Dobbs action. Best part of this game is all the random helmet sticker swapping. Can’t wait to see the wacky combos. Also- QB Antonio Pipkin from Division II Tiffin University is intriguing to me. Not only have I never heard of the school, Pipkin has some crazy numbers. Career stats- 10,940 yards passing, 2,207 yards rushing, and some swegggggg (It’s the swagger version of swag and it sounds less douchey). Is he going to actually pan out in the NFL? Probably not, but if he does I am going to look like a gotdammmm genius.
#Kansas at #4 Kentucky. Saturday 6:30 eastern. ESPN.
I know I know. I just said why college basketball sucks. But this is why college basketball doesn’t suck. The two most storied basketball programs facing off with an over flow of talent. Must watch. But for those of us on the east coast, this game is subject to blackout. And by that I mean it is dangerously close to that time on Saturday where 70% of adults are choosing to blackout instead of watching 18 year olds who look 27 play basketball.
Federer vs. Nadal in Australian Open Championship. Sunday 3:00 AM eastern. ESPN.
This is for you crazy tennis assholes who are going to wake up at 3am or come home from a nice night out at the Waffle House with the boys and wanna watch some tennis.We got Nadal v. Federer Sunday in the Australian Open Championship. Must watch tv at a very must-sleep hour. I became a fair-weather tennis fan two years ago. Fun to watch a sport with great hair, a super culturally diverse fan base, and referees with accents. I think they are called judges. Don’t tell me you don’t want to watch these two dudes get sweaty while grunting after some balls. Hey take a photo with you and your bros in your skimpys drinking some tall Busch Ices while watching this and tweet it at me. Winner gets featured in next weeks Dude Article. A prestigious piece unlike any of this other lowbrow crap I mindlessly type every week.
Alright now for the really good stuff. I am kind of burnt out on sports. If you’re like me, I watch an abnormal amount of tv shows. If you haven’t watched these shows, you need to get your shit together, stay in all weekend, AND BINGE.
Show 1- Taboo. FX.
YOOOOOO. Started watching this yesterday. Already watched all 3 episodes that have aired so far. Tom Hardy is unreal. Basically he’s a british badass who inherits this land that a bunch of people want because it influences the British American war and blah blah. Tom Hardy has traveled the world and seen some shit and a bunch of people want to kill him…but in typical Tom Hardy fashion he just kicks people’s ass. Please people, go to FXnow and watchhhhhh. If you don’t have a provider log in you can watch 1 episode for free. Best show on TV right now. I am literally shaking and peeing myself right now just waiting for the next episode. So far -9.5/10.
Show 2- The Young Pope. HBO.
Jude Law. So hot right now. A douche young American Pope. This show is interesting cuz I have no idea where it is going. 4 episodes are on HBO Go right now so if you don’t have it quit being poor and pay up. So far 8/10. While you’re at it knock out the best show of all time Game of Thrones. I assume you are a normal person and watch GOT but if you haven’t….. You can take your ass to Canada.
Show 3- Goliath. Amazon.
Billy Bob Thorton is the man. An OG. If you have Amazon video watch it now. I watched the entire season in 2 days. Badass Billy Bob is a lawyer in a case against a huge Weapons manufacturing company. 8.5/10
Show 4- Stranger Things. Netflix.
Dope show. Dope soundtrack. Dope characters. Dope setting. Crazy fuggin monsters and kids that have been genetically experimented on. Can’t wait for season 2. 8.4/10.
Show 5- The OA. Netflix.
Not going to even try and explain what the show is about. Absolute insane but it is awesome. On Netflix check it peeps. 8/10.
Other notables: The Night Of on HBO is pretty damn awesome. Makes you wonder if Aaron Hernandez is really a bad person or if he is just joining a gang in prison to not get shanked. True Detective Season 1 not Season 2 on HBO is literally must see TV. It has been out for a couple years so I didn’t include it in my top 5. But True Detective’s first season was some of the best TV I have ever seen. And of course you got your classics Breaking Bad, The Office, Dexter, and a sneeeeeeeakkkyyyy classic in the making Better Call Saul. All on Netflix my people.
Seriously though, if you haven’t watched Game of Thrones in its entirety at least 3 times you are less of a human being.