I’m about to talk about how much I hate Duke-UNC basketball, the state of the New York Knicks, Money Manziel’s comeback, and mustaches aka lip worms. Let us waste no time.
Duke vs. UNC basketball
Living in Raleigh, I live smack dab in between both of these schools. Don’t like Duke, absolutely hate UNC. Both think they’re balls don’t sweat and I’m sick of it. OH MAN WHAT A RIVALRY BABY!- Dicky V voice. I don’t care. You will play each other twice if not 3 times. Don’t care. Yes great game last night as Duke won 86-78 blah blah. UNC is going to win at home next time oh man what a rivalry. Rivalries better than this game are as follows
- Texas vs. Texas A&M football. Sad this rivalry is gone. So much hatred and tradition and it came the last week of the season. UNC Duke basketball does not even compare. If you disagree with me please, PLEASEEEE come at me fam. Its 2017 use whatever social media platform you want to get embarrassed on.
- Raiders vs. Broncos (little biased but I have seen men get stabbed over these games)
- Real Madrid vs. Barcelona. Yep. I’d rather watch two of the greatest soccer players of all time battle it out.
- Chipotle vs. the world. Im sick and tired of people bashing Chipotle. Moe’s is good if you like processed cheese and free chips? Freebirds gets second place followed by Qdoba. Chipotle is king.
Lebron vs. Warriors. Lebron flops, Durant is desperate, Curry somehow gets a free pass for not playing defense, and Draymond Green is just an angry human.New York KnicksCharles Oakley punched security before getting booted out of Madison Square Guarden was the most exciting thing to happen at a Knicks game since Linsanity. And then we got 1st team all-asshole Spike Lee saying he will personally pack Phil Jackson’s bags himself. HAA. Because Phil Jackson is the reason the Knicks are dysfunctional. It’s not Carmelo or James Dolan, it’s the greatest NBA coach of all time being team president. Spike was the kid who showered with his swimsuit on in the locker room. Spike you don’t even pack your own bags. I wish Spike would make a sad Knicks movie with himself as the main character. He can show all the losses he’s witnessed, and then cut to a black and white scene of himself walking through Central Park kicking rocks and feeling sorry for himself. Here is when it gets real good. Spike sits down on a park bench, when he notices a hat that is somehow cooler than his mega-fresh hat collection (examples below). He puts the hat on….and all of the sudden, images of the triangle offense and managerial tactics pop into his head. Spike immediately leads a protest leading to the firing of every Knicks front office member, leaving himself as head coach. So basically its a Mockumentary with a little mixture of Like Mike. Think I just caught my big break. This could be big time @WarnerBrosMovies.Turtle head looking boiiiMONEY MANZIEL BAKKK YALLSo there is a report the CFL Saskatchewan Roughriders worked out ol Johnny balls balls. The Roughriders are denying the report which means they 100% worked him out. As all of us crazy CFL fans know, this would be a violation of the CFL’s tampering rules. But dammit how great would the CFL be with Manziel in it? Let’s make it happen. Let’s get him as close to his boy Drake in Toronto, aka “the 6”, as possible. How great would it be if the CFL ratings passed the NFL’s and Goodell had no choice but to resign and let Manziel AND Aaron Hernandez (who has yet to be disciplined by the NFL for multiple homicide) back in the league. So if we #MakeTheCFLGreatAgain we also #MakeTheNFLGreatAgain.MUSTACHESLet’s go into the weekend on a solid note. Best NFL mustaches of the last 10 years.1. Jake ‘The Snake’ Plummer
Absolute no brainer. The cabbage, the shades, the stache extending below the bottom lip. Feathered and lethal.
2. Zach MettenbergerTell me isn’t agent Steve Murphy from Narcos. From hunting Escobar to backup QB for the Steelers. Crazy career path Zach.3. Carson PalmerWow. Astounding. The 2 shades of brown.. accent the mustache… in such a way. Carson Palmer for Cheyenne, Wyoming Sheriff 2k17.4. Big BenWHAT. OL WILLIE WONKA LOOKIN ASS BOI. Don’t know how this didn’t go viral.