It’s time to make football fun again. No more roughing the passer. No more 4 hour games. No more Breast Cancer Awareness Month. No more penalties for touchdown celebrations. It’s time to bring back a league that wasn’t politically correct. A league that failed miserably because it was ahead of it’s time. It’s time to bring back the XFL.
After watching the ESPN 30 for 30: This Was the XFL I found myself in a state of nostalgia. I remember watching the opening XFL game from my dorm on Walsh floor at Saint Louis University. We ordered some pizzas, drank some beers, and kicked off our Saturday night by enjoying this new thing called the XFL. And while the league ultimately folded and was a massive disaster it built itself on so many things which this country needs. First and foremost: Actual football. Today’s NFL game is so watered down. Because of lawsuits and concussion fears the rules have completely tamed the game. But will these so-called safety rules ultimately do anything? I say no, because today’s athletes are faster, stronger, and more athletic than they’ve ever been. So making it illegal to hit a defenseless receiver across the middle might help, but it’s like putting a band-aid on a shark attack victim. These dudes are freaks of nature who collide every play at a speed and velocity that’s going to affect their health regardless of these petty rules.
The fact is Americans love violence. Whether it’s right or wrong this country was built on violence. We love our guns, our violent movies, graphic video games, sports that inflict pain etc…It’s a violent country and Americans want to see destruction. The XFL is the perfect league to wet this appetite. Bring back the rules of no fair catches, bring back the bump and run on receivers past 5 yards, bring back the touchdown celebrations. We want to be entertained by these gladiators. The reality is none of us cares if a player beats a woman, drinks and drives, or runs an illegal dog fighting ring. We don’t care because we all support the game and the popularity of the NFL continues to grow. We’re all hypocrites, so why not just go all in on a league like the XFL that doesn’t even attempt to care.
The timing could not be more ripe. We need to counteract the PC culture and what I deem the pussification of America. Let’s counter it with no holds barred football, scantily clad cheerleaders, and a league that knows the value of entertainment. Imagine the camera panning to the sideline and Johnny Manziel crushing a Miller Light on the bench instead of looking at Microsoft Surface pics of the previous drive. Imagine a league where the cheerleaders are giving the fans lap dances in the end zone seats. Imagine sideline reporters asking personal or creative questions instead of the basic “what do you have do to play better in the 2nd half?”
So what do you say Vince McMahon, can we give it a second chance? I need this. America needs this. So get your Tim Tebows, your Vince Youngs, and your Kellen Winslow Jr’s and let’s make football great again with the return of the XFL.